Tough Stuff.

I haven't written in a while. I don't even know if anyone read this, but that's ok.

I have done SO much in the past month. I had my Prev Med rotation - short days and information I know a lot about, so it was enjoyable for me! I only completed 5 days of the rotation since I had to leave to go to Plum Island.

Plum Island was AMAZING. It was everything I could have wished for, and amazing people too! I got to touch and see animals with FMD (Foot & Mouth Disease), Exotic Newcastle (both viscerotrophic and neurotrophic), HPAI (highly pathogenic avian influenza), and African Horse Sickness. We spent a few days at Cornell, had a day off in Boston, and went to the island for 2 days. I couldn't have imagined a better time there!

After Plum Island, I had one week of vacation with Chris at the lake - it was wonderful, and I was happy to have time to spend with just the two of us without any other obligations.

I am currently on my small animal emergency/critical care rotation. It is a 4 week rotation full of lots of learning, lots of patients, and lots of stories you couldn't make up if you wanted to!

I had the first 2 days of the rotation off - everyone is randomly assigned a letter that corresponds to a schedule, and I think I got one of the best letters! I have one weekend day off each of the 4 weekends. Considering some people don't have any weekend days off, I think I'm pretty lucky.

I spent my first few days working in the ICU. When you're in ICU you do hourly patient care, which starts 30 min before the hour and usually finishes sometime after... sometimes, it's just in time to start the next hour's treatments! We were busy during the 2 days I spent in the ICU.

I am currently on ER. We have busy days and we have slow days. The most patients I've ever had in one day (so far, knock on wood) is 3. Saturday I had a neurologic dog with either tick paralysis or coonhound paralysis - we will only know which it is when I call the owners to find out whether or not she is making a recovery. She was non-ambulatory when she came in.

I've had some crazy owners that definitely made me laugh. When answering calls the other day I had a woman tell me her 10lb dog ate a frog that was still alive inside of it's belly. I like clients bc they make me smile.

They also sometimes make me very sad. Today I had the sweetest patient. She is a mixed breed dog who stole my heart. She can't walk or stand, but she smiles whenever you give her attention. After a short work-up, we were able to determine that she has multifocal neurologic lesions - likely in the brain and spinal cord. The owners opted to take her home for the evening for one last night together before euthanasia in the morning. It will be my first pet euthanasia. I hope they give her lots of love and lots of yummy treats tonight. I've already been crying - I don't know if this will ever get any easier.

Recent Thoughts.

As I return home from Iowa, everyone keeps asking me "How was it?!" to which I can only say "it was okay. I learned a lot."

What did I learn? I learned that I don't think I can work with pigs everyday for the rest of my life. Me? Not becoming a swine vet?! I know. I can hardly believe it myself. But, maybe I'm just not cut out for the job. Or, maybe the job isn't cut out for me.

I loved a lot of things about my trip to Iowa. I loved getting to know Kate - my roommate and hostess for the weeks I was there. I loved waking up everyday knowing I wasn't going to be sitting in a classroom. I loved the confidence I gained in being at a farm with other students without a clinician present. I loved the fact that I can cut open an animal and identify all of their internal structures without a problem. I loved not ever sitting around bored trying to waste time. I loved the experience, the knowledge, the pigs, and the people at Iowa State. I didn't love the job.

"WHAT!?!" has been the response I've gotten. "Why not?!" when I mention I don't think I'll work with pigs for my life. Well, for a lot of reasons. It was everything I thought it would be and everything I didn't want it to be.

I am a person who gives presentations to the community on what I believe in. I go out and present to the Lions, Kiwannis, etc Clubs in and around Columbus - to teach them how and why the pork industry raises pigs the way we do today. I love the pork industry, and I love everything positive that the industry has to offer. I believe that MANY producers respect their animals and love what they do. I believe that there are a lot of good people and families involved in raising pigs today.

I saw a lot of farms that were clean, organized, had great ventilation, and few sick pigs. I also saw a lot of different farms. Not everything was as wonderful as I would have liked it to be.

We spent a lot of time evaluating pigs, posting pigs, collecting samples, and disinfecting everything we brought with us. Because of the strict biosecurity on hog farms today, it was required that we wiped or sprayed (sometimes both) everything that came out of our vehicle at the farm. I completely understand this practice, and support cleaning of one's self and instruments before switching patients and facilities. However, I believe this is why I got so sick.

Somewhere between the Lysol and the few barns with poor ventilation, I lost my immune system. I was so sick I couldn't breathe. Dressed in disposable (non-breathable) coveralls everyday- some hot days, some cold days - with a mask on my face, wearing ear plugs, changing plastic boots between barns, euthanizing, cutting, and dragging pigs... I realized this wasn't what I loved.

I love the animals. I love the thrill of playing detective - finding the pig that represents the herd and evaluating it. I don't love euthanizing pigs. I don't like watching pigs die. And, I don't like way I felt (physically, mentally, and emotionally) at the end of everyday.

Tuesday, May 18th was the day I decided I wouldn't be able to work with pigs anymore. Tuesday was a long, hot, exhausting day. Tuesday I had a negative interaction with someone, and it was enough to push me over the top. Tuesday was a day that changed my life.

Here I am, home from Iowa. I had expected to meet people, but I never expected to find such a great friend in Kate. I expected to walk away even more excited about pigs than I had ever been, but I never expected I would walk away questioning whether or not I want to work with pigs or what my career path might be from here.

I am left with many questions, but I am also left with plenty of time to figure out what I love and what drives me. I have confidence that when I finish veterinary school next year, I will walk away with a love and passion for my job, whatever it may be.

corn fed, country raised

i can hardly believe i've already been in iowa for a week!

things here have been fantastic. we went to farms on monday, tuesday, and thursday. wednesday was set as downtime in between farms, and we were able to have our "orientation" (just a few days into things...)

the farm we visited on thursday was much smaller than the ones we were at earlier in the week. monday and tuesday we saw barns with 1500 pigs/barn, giving 15,000 pigs on one site. the weather was less than ideal, but the pigs were seemingly content in the barns.

tuesday was my birthday. tuesday was also the first time in my life i euthanized an animal. the pig i euthanized was sick and was almost septic. after humanely euthanizing the pig, i posted it. the necropsy revealed that there was a strangulating intestinal hernia and the pig was unable to move any food through it's intestines. it was very interesting to see, and i learned a lot from this experience.

thursday was our first day by ourselves. i am in a group with kate (my hostess with the mostest here in ames) and seth (a student from penn), and it was just us. we were responsible for thorough evaluation of all of the barns on-site, and if any pigs were experiencing disease we were responsible for posting representative pigs and collecting sample tissues. lucky for the pigs, none of them appeared to be sick and we only needed to draw blood for PRRS status testing.

friday the 3 of us worked together (at the school) to put together a powerpoint presentation for the group of our findings from the previous day. we also had to write a case report. our presentation went well, and led to discussion of challenges producers face with managing large (or small) scale swine operations.

we had the weekend to ourselves, and it was delightful. i couldn't have asked for better hosts! kate and phillip are great, and i'm incredibly thankful to have stayed with them this past week.

tomorrow morning, the 5 students will head to minnesota where we'll stay for the week. there is a production system that is experiencing some issues that we need to help evaluate. still split into our teams, we are responsible for going to upwards of 30 farms in 4 days between the 5 of us. we are to collect samples and evaluate each site. it's quite the opportunity and i'm very excited to go there! this is the best hands-on rotation, and i can't imagine not coming here for it!!!

PIGS... i love pigs!!!

i am so very happy to be in iowa!!!

today was cold. today was wet. today there were 40 mph winds and sleet hitting my face while i stood outside learning how to post a pig. today i did what i love. today i was filled with the enthusiasm of a 5 year old in a candy store. today was miserable. and yet, today was everything i could have dreamed of, and more!

kate and i rode to school together today - i'm certainly glad that we did bc iowa state's vet school campus is confusing. not to mention, it's currently under construction and therefore even more complicated than need be.

we had a BRIEF orientation and signed away our lives to voluntarily swab our nostrils before and after every farm visit so one of the researchers here can track whether or not humans are able to carry anything from the farm in their nostrils... without much further knowledge, i can't explain it any better.

next, we packed up and headed to the farm. upon arrival, each student was assigned a barn and we were to critically evaluate and record our findings. after our walk-throughs of the barns we met up with the group again. because not everyone had finished, a few of us were assigned a second barn. after finishing both of my barns it was time to learn how to post a pig. (posting a pig, by the way, means essentially cutting open a freshly dead pig to inspect it's organs and body systems to analyze a potential cause of disease - it's similar to an autopsy on a human, but done on the farm). after learning how to collect samples properly, the wind picked up to insane speeds and began throwing the rain and sleet in our faces. we moved indoors to snare and bleed pigs. (bleeding a pig, by the way, just means collecting blood from it). we each had to bleed 10 pigs and snare 10 pigs for one of our rotation-mates. i excelled. i love bleeding pigs. when i worked in the research lab, we used to collect hundreds samples from pigs. i can bleed pigs confidently, and i did. because our group finished first, we were given the task of teaching a shadowing 2nd year vet student how to bleed pigs. we did this quickly, and she was an expert bleeder in no time at all! after that, the weather began to clear up (by clear up i mean the sleet had stopped and the wind was probably down to 30mph). we were given the option of posting one pig per student. i jumped at the chance, and kate and i were the first students to post our pigs.

my pig died of congestive heart failure. the inside of the body was a fantastic sight. kate's pig likely died of a chronic infectious disease. that's all i'll say, without too many details. i will also refrain from posting any pictures from such events, though it's by far the coolest thing i have done since i started clinics.

tomorrow, we teach. we will have a group of 22 2nd and 3rd year vet students, and we will teach them how to post pigs (in small groups), snare and bleed pigs. i can't wait! two of my favorite things combined into one day... teaching and pigs. i couldn't ask for a better birthday present.

goodbye, cardio... hello, iowa and pigs!

I very much enjoyed my first week of Cardiology! I saw some of the most amazing cases... from a dog getting a re-check after his Tetralogy of Fallot surgery to a pacemaker put in my patient's heart, I learned a lot! I couldn't possibly have enjoyed Cardio more than I did in week 1. I wish I had written about it when I was in the middle of it and could portray the excitement I had during that week. Dr. Scansen is an amazing clinician and teacher, and I really enjoyed learning from him. Dr. Kent is incredibly personable, and though I had all of my cases with Dr. Scansen, I enjoyed working around her too.

Week two was anything but enjoyable. I spent my days upset, hurt, and worst off - in tears. The clinicians really make a difference. Despite the ups and downs, I learned a lot on Cardiology and am glad I didn't opt out of it.

I was truly terrified of the rotation before I took it, but have since come to terms with the fact that I feel confident in my ability to hear and at least give differentials for murmurs depending on their sound and location.

I arrived in Iowa this evening, after a 10 1/2 hour drive here today. I am exhausted, am finishing up some powerpoint slides (136 of them to be exact) that are due for tomorrow morning, and going to bed. I'm staying with Kate and her husband. Kate and I are both on the swine rotation these 2 weeks - I'm excited to spend some time doing something I love.

(pictures from the 2 weeks of cardio to come soon)

long week. long day. hello, cardio!

so, as i leave the world of equine, i'll do a quick look back at the past week...
cases i saw and treated included: rectal tear in a pony, septic foal times 3, colic times who knows, salmonella horse, diarrhea in foals, guttural pouch mycosis, a fractured foal leg, a deep laceration, a miniature cow in labor, a baby reindeer, and last but not least... this morning's 4am equine dystocia! dr. mudge commented on friday that the only horse emergency we hadn't seen was a dystocia and that we needed one this weekend... well, we got one! and i got called in for it (well, i got called in because the tech ruth is essentially the most inefficient person i've ever met but that's another story)...

below are all of the pictures from the end of my equine emergency rotation as well as pictures of my first cardio patient today - a jack russell terrier with severe pulmonic stenosis and tricuspid dysplasia (thanks, allison, for helping me pick my case - you're the best!) adam and i rocked out patient #1 on cardio! :) wahoo!

miniature cow and calf
catheter i placed on an emergency case

radiographs of a horse chest
mama reindeer and baby (who i gave multiple treatments to!)
giving a K Pen injection... because this takes at least 10 minutes to give, we had plenty of time to take a picture!
Sam & Amy in isolation
cutest little foal to ever exist... I LOVEEEEE HER!!
on Equine ICU overnights you also take care of any in-house food animal cases (ie making a weak calf nurse every 2 hours)
gigantor foal!

my equine ICU group, including Dr. Mudge! <3
best. picture. ever. my last hours of equine ICU... those are all of the doctors with chains on the foal (stillborn) to pull it out of the mare while allison and i held the mare...
arrive at school at 4:30am... assist with mare dystocia... by 7:30am head to cardio for an entirely different set of patients and topics... 14 hours put in at school today on 2 rotations...

i love veterinary medicine!!!!! <3

tired, but happy! i love owners!

I worked from 8am-8pm today... technically I was at the hospital about 13 hours, but who's counting?

For the first time, I worked with an owner today! Oh, she was so sweet! She brought us a brunch cake, strawberries, and grapes - and she just adores her horses. She has a mare in the hospital right now for a rectal tear, and she and the mare are both just the sweetest. I worked with her horse as much as possible today, partially because I enjoyed working with the woman so much and partially because I adored her little mare. I braided a horse tail today for the first time, and I must say it looked pretty darn good!

We stayed plenty busy all day, even without any emergencies coming in. The girls overnight last night had a bit of a crazy and hectic night complete with colic surgery on a gelding that arrested! After about 7 minutes of trying everything they could think of, they horse's heart started beating on it's own again and about 20 min later it started breathing on its own! He looked great today, and I was pretty glad to see that he was feeling better throughout the day.

It was a good day, overall. I just love the equine vets at the hospital - some of the techs are equally as wonderful to work with. I think I'm really going to miss working with horses...